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Omiai Update~~~ Sept 11, 2024

I know I haven't updated you on my last omiai because so much happened at that time. If I wrote about everything, I'd be glued to my phone for hours, so I'll try to summarize.

I went to the aquarium with Hair-san and brought my daughter. We had a wonderful time. Honestly, Hair-san was great with Moemi, and I was really grateful for. He was also very generous and sweet, however, he seemed a bit neurodivergent in the sense that he lacked social awarness. At first, I thought he was just nervous during our omiai, but that wasn’t the case. I realized I couldn't marry someone like that because I like to be led in relationships. With someone like him, I was afraid I'd have to do most of the leading. Even though he would take care of the bills and I could be a stay-at-home wife and mother, I’d still have to "wear the pants," which would keep me in a more masculine, "doing" energy. 😔

I decided not to continue seeing Brady Bunch-san either. I felt guilty, but there were several reasons. He was much older than me, and after him being suddenly admitted to the hospital for a serious illness, I became worried I'd be more of a nurse than a wife. I also realized he wasn't prepared for more children. He had a two-seater BMW Corvette and a BMW motorcycle, yet claimed he wanted more kids. It seemed more like a midlife crisis than a plan for a family. After I told him I didn’t want to continue, he mentioned he was talking to six other women anyway and then reported me to his agency. 😑 lol

Apparently, if you agree to go out with someone again after the first omiai but don’t go on a date, you have to pay a ¥20,000 penalty fee. It didn’t matter that on the day we were supposed to go out, I was dressed and ready, but he had to go to the hospital. It also didn’t matter that we talked daily after that. Through our conversations, I realized we weren’t a good match. 😑😵‍💫

At that time, I had to pay the penalty for exceeding the three-date-per-month limit. I was also paying for babysitters, and I wasn’t trading at that time because I was in the middle of changing brokers… so I ran out of money. 😅💸

I told my agency I had to quit because I couldn’t afford the fees, the monthly membership, my high Minato-ku rent, utility bills, and childcare.

But after discussing it with my parents and praying, I decided to go on a recess instead. A recess means your profile is hidden for up to three months while you sort things out. You can't go on any dates during that time.

I thought about staying friends with Hair-san and helping him feel more comfortable around women so he could find a good match, but that was against the rules. 

It’s been a little less than a month (I think?) since I went on recess. Now that I'm trading again and making money, I might join the marriage agency again soon, but I need to take new profile pictures because my hair has changed.

I also joined a dating app called Tapple, similar to Pairs, and I got a LOT of active matches.  I was surprised, being a single mother and all. But many men sent me messages, and I thought I could keep up with them all, but I get lazy sometimes. 😔

There’s one man I'm giving more attention to...we will see.

I’m talking to a few other guys as well, but I like the flexibility of dating apps more than the marriage agency.

By the way,  I finally got my daughter the support she needs. It turns out she has a form of autism, but she's now getting the help she needs. I won’t go into too much detail, but she will be fine! 🥹

I have a lot to do today, but I’m thankful I could do this update.